If you want to attract an honorable lady, be an honorable man.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Fistful Of Dollars: Review

I saw this movie in Manassass, and this movie is the epitome of the pointless movie. Not only is there no moral, there is also almost no comprehensible story-line. I will summarize.

Clint is traveling along, and comes upon a small town with almost no inhabitants, ruled by two warring factions.  The two factions are acutally two families living at opposite ends of town. One is an American gun dealer, the other a Mexican wine dealer, both dealing illegally. The only other people besides the dealer that live in this town are the coffin maker and the owner of the bar. Clint starts to work for one faction, helping them against the other, by killing four of them for shooting at him and his horse as he rode into town. This part was the only part I enjoyed. He walks down the street, and tells the coffin maker to get three coffins ready, since it was three guys harassing him earlier. He goes down to the gun dealer, and after they refuse to apologize for shooting at him, they try to shoot him. He of course, whips out his gun and shoot them all before they ever touch him. He walks back to the coffin maker, and utters the funniest words in the whole movie in total Clint cool-man style. "My bad. Four coffins."

That's where the humor ends.  

Anyway, he works for one side, then after learning that the wine dealers held up a gold train and killed all the people, he goes to where all the dead people are laying, and relocates two of the bodies to a graveyard. I have no idea why. He then goes to the other side (the gun traders) and tells them about the gold robbery, and tells them if they give him money he will tell them where to go get some guys who will tell them about it. They do, and they rush off to the graveyard to get the men, who they think are still alive. The wine dealers get wind of this, and a shootout occurs at the grave-site where the g-dealers are trying to capture the dead guys before the w-dealers kill them to keep their mouth shut. Again, I have no idea why Clint does this. Clint then goes and hides out at the w-dealers ranch, looking for something, not really sure what, and not really sure why he is there. An online review I read said he was looking for the gold they stole, but you certainly don't get that feel on your own.  While he is there, he accidentally knocks out the chief bad-guys girlfriend when she startles him. There is an odd story behind this girl. She is actually married to another man, and Ramon, the chief wine dealer, was twitterpated, claimed the husband cheated him in cards, just so he could steal his girl.

 So this poor girl lives with him as a concubine always wanting to go back to her husband and boy. Well, in the gunfight back at the graveyard, the w-dealers capture one of the g-dealers. Clint goes to the g-dealers and turns over the girl as ransom for the other man. They trade people, and then Clint pulls a few tricks. He goes to where the girl is staying, kills all the men in the house, reunites the girl with her husband and boy, and tells them to run across the border before Ramon catches them, because, as he puts it, "I knew a girl like you once, and there was no-one to help."

So, after getting back from this escapade, the w-dealers find out that Clint did the evil deed, and they capture him and torture him. Clint, the Hollywood hero, of course, escapes, but barely surviving. He escapes to a cave where the coffin maker takes care of him. W-dealers think the g-dealers are hiding him, and they burn their house down and kill every last man woman and child in their in revenge. They then proceed to torture the bar keeper who made friends with Clint. Clint arrives just in time, healed enough to fight. There is a ongoing controversy with Ramon and Clint over which weapon is better: Ramon's rifle, or Clint's pistol. Here, that argument plays out. Ramon is famous for heart shots. So Clint appears, and Ramon shoots him in the heart and Clint falls over.......
...and gets back up. Ramon is worried, and shoots him again. Clint falls, and gets back up. Ramon is getting very nervous and shoots him repeatedly, all with the same result. Clint walks up and shoots all of Ramon's buddies and shoots the rifle out of Ramon's hand.

 He flips back his poncho and you see now that he made himself a homemade bullet-proof vest in the mine from an old metal drum, protecting him from Ramon's pot-shots. He then removes it, and then decides to find out once and for all which weapon is better. So Clint arranges a contest. They both throw their guns on the ground, unloaded, and the one who can pick it up, load it, and shoot the other person, wins.  Well, this is Hollywood, so of course Clint just so whoops Ramon's pants off, he shoots him, and Ramon dies, his beloved Winchester failing him at the last. Clint then grabs a mule standing around, and rides out of town, the bar-keeper very injured, and the coffin maker with a lot of work on his plate. 

The End. 

The Good: Not much. I guess it's good Clint got the girl and her husband together and safe away. He also proves my opinion that Pistols are infinitely superior in speed and maneuverability to rifles in close combat. :) 

The Bad: Just about everything else. Because of him, basically the entire population is killed, and he rides away with money in his pocket after doing a lot of the killing. A completely useless story-line with lots of useless happenings that don't fit in with the plot at all. Completely lame. 

The Rest:
Completely weird score. Its..... odd, dark, eerie, and fits the movie very well. Very hard to describe. Here's a link for my score oriented friends. :)   
Overall rating: 1/2 stars. NOT recommended. 
BTW, the pistol he has on the movie poster is the pistol he has in The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. The one he has in this movie, he is holding in bottom picture. I'm sure none of you wanted to know that, but since I noticed it, I thought I would throw that in. :) 

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Master and Commander: Review

I've seen this plenty of times, but I saw it again in Mannassas for the sole purpose of doing a post on it.

The Plot:
The British ship, HMS Surprise, set in the Napoleonic era, has been commissioned with the task of tracking down the Acheron, a French war-vessel that has been hounding the British fleets and coasts. In this task, they are setting out to capture a vessel with more men, more guns, and a bigger, tougher ship. Through much chasing, losing and finding, the Surprise eventually draws the Acheron in close, and boards the ship, and takes the ship a prize.
The Worldview: This movie has a very nice twist in the story plot to it that gives it a bit of a Christian feel. The captain had been afectionately dubbed "Lucky Jack" by his crew, because his plans always work and he always does the right thing and gets the job done. This is a bit of a pride factor for him. He refuses to turn back from following this ship even after going farther than his orders told him to go. This causes some tension with the ship's doctor, an avid naturalist who loves to explore and categorize animals and plants. A scene where they were going to stop in the Galapagos for a pit stop and they are sidetracked by news of the Acheron, causes lots of friction between the captain and the doctor. They continue to pursue the ship, and due to an accident where one of the sailors was talking potshots at a flying seagull, the doctor is wounded. This is a turning point for the movie. Jack is forced to humble himself, stop pursuing the ship, and go back to the Galapagos for the doctor to heal, since a wounded doctor is no good in helping in a sea-fight. The doctor slowly heals, and Jack decides it is time to head home, his traverse has been long enough. Due to the doctors exploring, they eventually find that the ship they are hunting is actually docked on the other side of the Island from them. They pull a few pranks, and after a fight, capture the ship. Jack sails home with his ship, and a young officer under him sails off in the Acheron, its new captain. They never would have gotten the ship unless the captain had humbled himself and turned around. A very nice twist with moral bearings that adds a real thrust to it.

The Good:
Jack humbles himself, and due to that, he gets what he is seeking after. A nice reminder that we are to humble ourselves and God shall lift us up. A very nice taste, that is very rare and very well done.
The captain has a faith in God, and they all pray several times as a ships company through the movie.
The Captain is also a excellent leader, one of the best themes through the movie as a matter of fact. He isn't snobby to the young kids on the ship, but is always kind and firm and willing to teach and helps them learn as he can. He also knows when young men need to have experiences that will stretch them, and several times assigns hard tasks with loads of responsibility to young men when needs arise. This is "Lucky Jack's" best quality I believe.

The Bad:
Minimal cussing, it seems you can't have a war movie without cussing..... grr.
One annoying stream of events where a young officer thinks he is a curse to the ship and drowns himself - very annoying indeed.  Some heated arguing scenes, and minimal drinking. Nobody gets positively drunk, but in one dinner scene everybody is slightly loopy.

The Rest:
The score is VERY well done. It fits the mood of the era and the feel of the movie. Even Gabe likes it I believe. :)  
Overall Rating: 4 Stars. The only reason its not five stars is because of the language. Recommended if you can get around the language.  

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Gods Curious Creatures and Lots of Them

Job 12:7-9  But ask now the beasts, and they shall teach thee; and the fowls of the air, and they shall tell thee:  Or speak to the earth, and it shall teach thee: and the fishes of the sea shall declare unto thee.
Who knoweth not in all these that the hand of the LORD hath wrought this?

Gods creatures are wonderful and fabulous, and I love hanging out around them. Recently, God  is giving more than my fair of them though! Now don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, but I just thought I would mention it to all the other animal fans who would be jealous. :)

Let's start from the top. Experience No.1 - Yes, I'm not kidding, we had a skunk on our back porch. Let me repeat for all those who think I am pulling their leg. We had a skunk on our back porch. Photographic evidence? You got it, coming right up.
The little fella hid behind our brick-pile and would not come out to save his poor furry soul.
He finally emerges and takes a peek around.
Exploring the wide and scary world
There is my evidence.  Evidently he was a spotted skunk, and they are naturally small.  This guy would have fit in my hat without trying.

Experience No. 2 - We had a chicken and duck butchering day. We did 3 ducks and 10 roosters.
The prisoners
Lots of help
Experience No. 3 - I went and roped sheep at my boss's place. The only reason I listed that in here is because I had never roped sheep before, and I had to catch it because it didn't look right. No exciting story or pictures, just roping sheep. :)

Experience No. 4 - Noah and I caught two big fat ole toads in our back pasture. Not really exciting, but fun just the same. :)
The picture doesn't do justice to these fat ole boys.
Experience No. 5 - IT'S BIRD SEASON!!!!  Oh yes, it's bird season, and I'm loving it. I borrowed a SWEET Remington 1100 from a friend of mine, and yesterday we went out with Pastor and three of his boys, Mr. K, Brennan, Dad and Noah. I think the sum total at the end was 53 doves. It was a REALLY good day. I got my limit (10) for the first time ever, and Noah and Brennan got real close with 8 apiece. Here is the final picture with the total tally.  
A good day's work
So yes, God's creatures are wonderful, and I'm sure glad He lets me hang around them and kill them. :)